The last few weeks have been mentally and physically draining. You will have probably picked that up in my posts as you read them, even when I did not say it.
I talked about how I was so Craving quietness.
I was craving it badly that final week at work and after a week off, for the first time ever, I did not want to go back. Now I love work still, so don’t get me wrong. At work that has been a little trouble going on, which I cannot go into and I won’ go into detail. It’s not directly at me and it’s not my employer causing it. But what has been going off, has affected the atmosphere due to this incident. It wasn’t quiet at work and the tension in the atmosphere was high and there still is tension. I dreaded going back after the quiet week I craved and my mood was very dark Monday. My mood is a little better but not much.
As I have been learning and as I mentioned here, I am a ‘Highly Sensitive Person’ (HSP) I discovered. With how I have been the last few weeks with the slight difficulty in the moving process, the tiredness both physically and mentally, I am really picking this up at work and it is affecting me. Yesterday, I found I was struggling walking at times, feeling like my legs were going to go from under me. My muscles not wanting to hold me up. This is one of the effects of stress. Not had this for a long time, to that extent and I am hoping my body does not do more of this.
Today, I am a little tearful, after calling into my bank and I have decided to call into a cafe before going home for a drink and then I will be sitting down with my bank details, checking where I went wrong and correcting my workings. I called into the bank because I noticed my standing order for my rent was returned. Looking at my balance, it looked like there was sufficient funds and I was fuming that it had been returned. After the bank looked into it, it turned out a payment elsewhere I made was put first (which that’s fine) and standing order returned, as there would have been insufficient funds. Thankfully no charges. I am usually very good when it comes to my own money, making sure I have sufficient funds and I thought I had made a note of this in my folder, so when I am home, I will be seeing if I did make a note of this other payment or not. And then I will be just having my quiet. I thought I was with it now, but obviously not.
My mood is not also helping with my sensitivity to sound I am having. I have finally got round to emailing my audiologist yesterday, so hopefully, I will hear of an appointment soon with a particular audiologist.