Anxiety that I nearly went home

I came across an email in my spam folder. Although it was there and still have suspicions, it had my details correct. I am assuming it’s another debt recovery for Spark Energy, but I won’t respond to these. If I am going to respond to anyone, it will be the first ones, but regardless, it sent me into anxiety. I did not feel well; my chest tightening a little, my throat tightening more. I felt sick. Surprisingly, I wasn’t breathing heavily and I was aware to keep it like that. I took sips of water and warned a person who I was in same room that I wasn’t feeling well. He knew what caused it, because of what I was chatting about before. I felt the need to maybe go home with not feeling well. I did not think I would be any good being there, but I was encouraged to stay and he asked me what helps to calm it. One being water, that I was already taking sips of. He was joking with me as well and we were chatting while he carried on working and me just sipping water.

Although I still did not feel well. It took the worst of in the end and, I was able to feel I could stay and carry on what I am doing. Lunch, I had a cob instead of chips, because I knew with how I was feeling I would struggle eating, which one the possibility of my throat seizing up when I swallow.

When it was time to go home, as I felt before, it filled me with dread. But I did not reveal that at my volunteer place. But they do know when time comes to my contract ending where I currently live, that I will be looking again, which they will give me a reference like before, if required.

Thursday, I plan to go back to CAB, to update them from previous week and ask them advice, as well as showing them that email. I want to see if there is a way I can complain about how this whole affair could have been done better. Not just by Spark Energy, but by the administrators as well.

The weekend just gone prior to all this, all I did was mostly sleep, or doze.

I really don’t want to be living where I am and the person said do you think you could move out earlier because of all that? I am not even going to see, because I know as much as I would like to leave now, everyone is doing what they need to do and reassuring me. As I am not being threatened and only witnessed, doesn’t mean you get that privilege to move before.

Only thing I am waiting in is actually speaking to the police about it. I have heard nothing since replying back to an email last Thursday night, giving my personal details to this policeman.
And from the other person I spoke to prior from the council, which he updated that the police had been to the property that afternoon and when they will be back dealing about the other, I’m no wiser what has gone off since. Like is he registered, or not? Was it in the property? Did they speak to the neighbour below who corrected me on the gun he was holding, because he witnessed it himself? Did that neighbour admit to them he seen it, if they did speak? The questions go on.

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