My feelings – Part 8

So it’s been about 4 months since my last, ‘my feelings’ post.
Part 7 was mainly my feelings brought on with the Coronavirus, due to things from that.
In this post there still is, but it doesn’t overtake like last post, because I’m working again in both jobs still, since back in them.
But as for the rest, some restrictions may have been lifted, but as you know if you are a regular reader, that I am in no hurry to go out there and join in.
I  continue to walk to and from work in both jobs and I shop at my local supermarket just down the road at most, twice a week. Nothing else, unless it’s important.
I think its too soon to go into my town centre and shop there. I have already seen, or experienced it myself where people don’t observe the 2 metre distance, so I ain’t going to join the crowd of shoppers (if there was in my area) for a shopping spree. I do this to protect others, to make sure I’m not going to be a carrier, because some person not observing social distancing, who is not in my circle, unsuspecting passed it onto me because they did not keep their distance. I had to politely tick someone off at the checkout of my local supermarket I was at, because she stood right behind me, instead of 2 metres. She moved back when I spoke. But it still wasn’t enough.

I have mentioned in brief in places as well as here, of going to my mum’s bungalow. I’ll be doing another trip this month. My anxiety was up in the roof going Friday. It didn’t help that I was expected to go with just less than 24 hours notice, to let in a council worker to do a service check of the boiler.
Regardless of the anxiety, it helped knowing my neighbour offered to help and take me.
I brought some things back while at it, that I hope to take to the nursing home one day. Just waiting on an email for that.
I also brought back her paperwork in folders that I planned to do, in addition to the mail that’s been piling up since November, when I was last there.
Amazingly, I sorted through that by the evening. But then with a system in place which I am so glad my mum has not got rid of again, since creating it again, helps.

Going through her paperwork regardless of anxiety, I realised I got my ‘business head’ on that I like to call it. It reminded me that this side of things I could do. But given the current situation with mum, which I have not shared with you fuly yet, I can’t do anything else, with not having access. But I won’t want to deal with everything when it comes to certain things anyway, I rather do this with someone else when this part has been sorted and someone is nominated, like the Social Worker mentioned one time on how things may go, if it happened.

I would like to transfer my mum’s mail to my address, but again, due to circumstances, I can’t do yet, until all this is sorted out.
Given the discussions this past week I’ve been having with mum’s Social Worker and her advocate, the long term solutions are being discussed, so the ball might be rolling, as they say.
I can see it will happen. Mum is not mentally well and from what I’ve been told, she’s declining further.
I am sad that this is what the future will be for my mum. But if nursing home is only the option, then where she is currently, I would like her to stay there, if mum is still not going to be able to communicate herself still. The nursing home is a suitable place for her needs and, it feels homely and theraputic.
When things have been decided officially, I will say more at some point later.

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21 thoughts on “My feelings – Part 8

    1. Yes. I was saying to the neighbour who took me, that I just so want a decision made now. I can see its going to be nursing home, so I just want bungalow gone.
      I don’t have access to mum’s bank account as she never got round to making that appointment that we both would have had to attend, to get me down as assisting her on her bank account when she can’t do it. If I had that access, I could have paid the bills where they don’t go out by direct debit.
      I just know I don’t want to go back to the bungalow. But I will.
      It’s the matter when they sort out the Court of Protection, with nothing else in place.

      1. Yes. But it’s my anxiety that makes it seem worse. I notice since last year how it can quickly peak.

      2. When mum was first in the nursing home, the social worker was saying how it takes some time to sort. So not sure how long thst part will go on for.

  1. Is it just you Liz, or do you have brothers and sisters? I can’t remember. If so, do you have Power of Attorney? That might make things easier as regards having the mail sent directly to you. Just a thought ❤

    1. It’s just me.
      There’s no Power of Attorney in place, so Court of Protection will be the route they will sort.

      1. I know I will be happy when mail can come to mine, because I am just wanting to make sure it’s already happening before the keys to bungalow are handed in, if this is the route that mum goes down, by being in a nursing home permanently. I want to make sure her mail doesn’t fall in hands that it shouldn’t fall in.

    1. I totally agree. I am avoiding for at least another year and then judge from there.
      It was crazy seeing some of the papers showing the queues with no one keeping their distance.
      I won’t be joining.

  2. Very wise in staying away from the shops that get crowded. It is hard to be out there now because not everyone agrees with the same things when it comes to handling this virus. I hope things go smoothly with your mom and there isn’t a lot of stress added to your lives, the both of you. Changes are always hard in the beginning.

    1. I think it doesn’t help with mixed messages from the Government either. (Our UK Government.) As well as you say everyone having their own views.
      I feel if I put myself in a crowd, I am just defeating the whole object when I had to stay home and go out only to work, or shop.

      Thank you.
      Even though anxiety quickly peaks at times for me and I get stressed, as I answered my neighbours question when she asked, “do you feel it helps having your mum in a nursing home, for you?” I said yes, it does. Even if it’s not what I wanted. Just knowing my mum is safe.
      As for how mum feels, I can’t imagine. But she has not asked to go home. Even though she didn’t want to be at bungalow, I still expected her to say something on the lines I want to go home, or not stopping here.

  3. You been having some hard tasks to deal with this week and you are lucky to have such good neighbours too. It is good to get ahead sorting through documents and paperwork like you are doing so you are well informed of everything. Take care no need to rush as you say. Blessings Liz

    1. I plan to go again this Saturday again. While there, run the cold taps with them not being in use for a long time.
      Collect other clothes of mum’s which will need to be laundered.

      I need to call at a house over the road, a friend that mum knew from school days. He put a card through her door at Christmas, as he does. So I bet he is wondering where she is. I have a letter written, in the event he is not in.

      I shall take her freezer food, so no more food goes to waste and turn the fridge freezer off.

      Then I shall see if I plan to bring anything else back, before sorting out a taxi.

      There is a home on the back. Mum took a shine at a couple of residents there. They sent her Christmas card at Christmas as they do. I wonder if they have noticed things have been quiet. I doubt I will call there myself on Saturday, but maybe some point later, let them know. I think I have enough for Saturday to do.

      1. I think so you have enough to do with sorting things out. Good you have a neighbour opposite who may keep an eye on the house for you. Slowly does it, sorting takes a lot of doing and often brings back memories which are ready to go or keep as the case may be. Take care Liz Bless you.

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