If I could stay in bed for I don’t know how many days and sulk it out I would. But I get up.
It’s important I get up, as I have my morning job to go to. The only job that feels secure right now.
The evening one that isn’t, with how that job makes me feel already, now makes it even more harder to be arsed to go to.
I sent an email to them, the day after bank holiday saying exactly how I feel about this since our team meeting. I feel better for doing that, even if nothing comes of it in the end.
I have always gave more than my 100% in a job, from ever since I left school and worked, but with how things once again go for me, I just wonder why bloody bother?
Why bother chasing for dreams, that end up being dreams still?
Regardless how I feel, I have my regular weekly chats with my neighbour, over a cuppa. Or we are out walking. Sometimes our meet ups maybe twice a week, even if I am just sat outside the flat a bit.
I don’t want mum in the care home she is currently in and I won’t be at rest until she is somewhere different. Preferably one of her choices of two places once discussed years ago, as I will mention in an upcoming post soon.
© Elizabeth Fisher and My Wellbeing and Learning Journey.
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